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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Why NOT To Piss Off A Writer

File this under the heading: Why Not To Piss Off A Writer


Moving forward; yesterday's work night was a good night. Why? Well, certainly not because a certain coworker has been pushing me patience toward it's limit. Actually, it's because I was a smart little cookie (writer, rather) and brought my beloved Black n' Red with me.

Black n' Red(tm) Notebook,
my good friend
So, when aforementioned jerk started pushing me, I was able to simply take out my notebook and escape the inane stupidity that was trying to force itself upon me.

I wrote most of a scene from the next book, Shadows On TheWall, in which Anthony finally pushes David to the point of violence. And you must understand, David is much like me in the respect that, while he talks a good game, he is generally laid back and non-violent.

Anywho, so, Anthony got thrown through a window (about ten stories up in a hotel) and now Cameo is cowering in the corner. And I feel fine! It's nice to be able to express myself so eloquently.

So, kids, remember this the next time you are pissing off a writer. We may not react much outwardly, but you are on our kill-off list.

There are only two types of people who sit around thinking of ways to kill off people:


and writers.

 As Castle would say, I'm the one that pays better.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A Scattered Accounting

Whoo, so it's been a little while since I blogged. Sorry 'bout that ya'll. I've been terribly scattered lately. I really do need an assistant to keep me organized. Between trying to make sure all the bills get paid on time, working six days a week, the apartment stays clean, Pangur Ban is fed-oh crap I forgot to refill her dish, dammit!
Hold on a sec, I'll be right back.....
Okay! So, as you might guess, blogging is not exactly at the top of the list. It's true, there have been several times in the last couple weeks where I have wanted to blog, but it's usually about silly things that probably only matter to eccentric, hermit-wannabe authors like me.

My CafePress shirt,
from CASTLE(abc TV show)

I haven't been writing much if at all, and it's seriously frustrating me. Logically, I know that I'll be much more emotionally stable if I get a few chapters out of my system, but I'm rebelling for some stupid reason.
I downloaded Flyleaf's 2009 album, Memento Mori, last week and I have been listening almost exclusively to it since. Literally, all of my side thoughts have been expressed in lyrics lately. It's wonderful in a frustratingly plagiaristic sort of way.

Also, I'm close to launching into a full rant on the topic of cuss words. It is a topic that frustrates me considerably, as I can see both sides of the story and wish only that everyone else could. They are WORDS. Words have only the power we give them. So, like anything else, the spirit in which they are used must be taken into consideration before sentencing someone.

Perhaps scattered was not a strong enough word to use to describe me lately. In fact, an example might best serve to demonstrate.

Today I woke up, fed Pangur, showered, filled out my CA voting ballot, called my dad, got dressed, checked the mail, drove to drop off my ballot, paid my electricity bill, went to the bank, filled out a credit card application, called my mom, texted my brother, surfed Amazon, checked FB, dA and YouTube, read the first 2 chapters of The Golden Lily, by Richelle Mead, and then realized it was 1:30 pm and I hadn't had anything to eat.

Now, normally in a day I might accomplish 3 of those things. In a WHOLE day, not in a matter of hours. I mean truthfully, out of all those, only 3 things. I could have a day where all I do is feed Pangur, shower and surf Amazon. And that is typical.
And now that I have to leave for work in half an hour I realize that I forgot to call the tire store about my car. Even though I made a list (a very scattered, crazy list of things to do, things to buy, and things to remember).
I'm this cose *hold up fingers about an inch apart* to giving up. I need an assistant, a keeper....
And for some reason, I am sounding more and more like Damon when I lose my temper, I keep saying things like "Bloody hell!" and "Blast it!" and "Oh for the love of..." I think I hang out with him too much. Actually, he's been avoiding me a bit lately, my hectic moods make him uncomfortable.

I think if I could convince myself to go to sleep before 2 am I might be able to start waking up earlier and actually accomplish something.
Off topic(not that there was a specific topic): I think I want the soundtrack to the new Underworld movie...I love Lacey Sturm's and Evanescence's contribution there.

I believe, what if I believe you? Forgive, relieve me, please come back to life. Come back to my life.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

But She Has A Great Personality!

I was looking at someone I've know for about five months today. Not a friend, just an acquaintance that I'm not overly fond of. As I looked, I realized that the person was really very unattractive. This seems harsh, I know, but allow me to explain.

I realized right after this exactly how harsh that really was, and immediately began to question my realization. Why was this person suddenly so unattractive, I asked myself? It came to me that this wasn't a sudden development. Rather, over the time I have known this person they have been slipping more and more in my perception. Perhaps interestingly, their outward appearance has not altered in that time, but I have grown to know them better and I realized that their insides were ugly.

The person is not attractive in physical aspects, but if their personality was better then it would be something easily overlooked. It's a cliche I know, but the line "oh, but they have a great personality" is true. Some people are plain or even unattractive by society's standards, but they have shining warmth and good humor which makes them beautiful.

In contrast to this person I was examining today, a few years ago I met a young man in a work situation (I no longer know him, so I feel I may be a little freer with details). When I met the young man, my first impression was not complimentary. Aside from his rather plain exterior, he seemed to have a sour disposition, and not much of a sense of humor. Being that it was a work situation, and not merely social, I was forced to endure this man whom I had immediately judged to be a donkey's rear end.

Day by day, I realized I was wrong. He had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor, an incredible sense of duty, and ambition up the wazoo.

As time as passed, I have realized how much we were actually alike. It has given me a nightmare of how people may in fact preceive me upon first meeting.

As my observations of his inner self grew, the way I saw his exterior changed as well. The plain young man was replaced by someone I respected and liked. I became attached and considered him a friend, and then began to wish for more. I didn't know at the time how my perception of him had altered from what a casual observer might find, until I introduced him to my best friend at the time.

She, of course, knew my feelings on the topic of him, and from my descriptions expected some godly representation of a man. Upon finding a rather plain, apparently serious young man, she was disappointed and did not hesitate much to tell me so.

There is a person I know now for whom I have enormous liking (friendship wise, don't get any ideas) and as I had this entire thought process today I began to wonder if my perception of this person had changed as well. As I thought, I couldn't see that it had, because this person had presented to me a warm, humorous exterior from the start. I came to the conclusion rather swiftly that I could not judge whether or not this person was attractive, because I had a biased opinion. The personality of this person is such that I would answer in the affirmative almost no matter what.

I could go over every relationship, of every degree, that I engage in with the humans around me, and find dozens more examples of this.

I am writing this morning to tell you, quite simply, that your personality (at least for me) is at least 80% of the beauty (or lack thereof) that I will perceive within you. First impressions are not always lasting. If I am wrong about you, and you show me, then I will change my opinions and my impression of you.

This has made me think of who I project to others, as well. I haven't been able to decide if I like who I think I'm projecting. Or, rather, if I like how people may be perceiving me. As I am sure I have said many times before, I really like myself. I do. But I know that not everyone is going to, and selfishly, I want them all to.

Food for thought.

On a side note: I am sunburned and uncomfortable. PALE AND PROUD! (my version of P & P)